The Saga Continues…

I got pulled aside while picking The Fiend up at rec again.  This time it was by the woman who runs the program.  It was about the not listening thing.  Apparently something we still need to work on.

The difference was I didn’t feel attacked in this conversation.  It was explained to me that one of the tactics they use with the kids is if they don’t comply with requests after a few tries the if-you-can’t-cooperate-we-will-have-to-talk-to-Mom-or-Dad card gets pulled.  Obviously to make it an effective tactic they actually have to tell Mom or Dad.  Makes sense to me.

The rec leader was very open to discussion.  She assured me that they think The Fiend is a great kid and that this is a temporary problem.  Letting me know was a disciplinary tactic, but also a way to get backup from me regarding the issue.  She pointed out that even the older kids have a hard time listening from time to time. 

I took the opportunity to voice my concerns regarding Amy’s response to The Fiend’s earlier apology.  The rec leader explained that she has been working with Amy to learn to not focus so much on being the kid’s friends and focus more on being the adult.  She let me know that she was modeling this ability for Amy.

In that moment I realized Amy was not picking on The Fiend, she just didn’t know how to handle her.  Here was a young woman struggling to learn how to deal with kids, and a big rowdy group of kindergarteners at that.  The Fiend, as you may have gathered from earlier posts, is not your typical kindergartener.  A kid like her would be pretty intimidating to an unseasoned child care provider.

The Fiend and I talked about this on the way home.  I told her that Amy was still learning how to take care of kids.  I let her know that I would be proud if she worked hard to help Amy by listening and cooperating.  She seemed to understand and get excited about the prospect of being a helper to Amy.  We had a great conversation.  Right up until I told her that she wouldn’t be having any desert for not listening again at rec, a previously agreed upon consequence.  Things got pretty quiet and grumpy after that.

Ah well, you can’t make everybody happy all of the time.